How Not To Paint Pickled Oak Cabinets

Pic Monkey Cabinets

This is the sad, sad state of my cabinets.  20 years of abuse has taken its toll.  They are like the giving tree of oak cabinetry.  Unlike “The Boy” in Shel Silverstein’s iconic tale, I realize what I have.  My poor cabinets have given enough.  It’s time I gave back.  Paint…the gift that keeps on giving.  My husband, practical man that he is, suggested I start in the laundry room.  At first I was insulted.  Why not start where everyone could see my DIY prowess?

IMG_9638

Even the primer looked better.  It was clean.  Then I put on the paint.  It looked pretty good.  I noticed it looked a little bumpy?  I proceeded with reckless abandon.  In a desperate attempt to finish my project while the kids were napping, I hurried and put on the glaze.  My heart sunk.  It.  Looked.  Awful.  It looked like the dirt from the mountains of clothes in my laundry room jumped on my paint.  The glaze was called “Van Dyke Brown.”  As in Dick Van Dyke, the comedian.  Which was an appropriately name.   Because my paint job was looking like a joke.  The cruel, cruel fate of a wasted naptime.  I could have caught up on my reality TV, exercised, painted my toenails, or SHOWERED for God’s sake.

_MG_9840_0674

 

This picture makes me want to weep.  Loud and long.

_MG_9648

 

Something was amiss.  Why didn’t my cabinets look like all of the before and afters on Pinterest? (Hint: the photo below IS my new image from Pinterest;)  Well, I figured out why.  I cut my losses and eventually covered up the funky latex…with Chalk Paint.

Laundry

I put in a S.O.S call to Dean and Daniel at my local Sherwin-Williams Store.  Here is the series of events and how NOT to paint oak cabinets!

1.  Rolled on primer with a foam mini roller.  Perfect.

2.  Applied two coats.  Sanded in between coats.  Perfect.

3.  Rolled on paint with a 3/8 inch mini roller.  Mistake.  Left nap marks.  Should have used 3/16

4.  Applied glaze.  Dried too quickly.  Should have used protrol (?) to “extend” the time I had to wipe off glaze.  I have also learned that mineral spirits work amazing.

I want this room to be pretty.  It is obvious from the picture below that this room I spend a considerable amount of time in.  It is also obvious that this project is inhibiting my ability to do my laundry.  Not good.  Going to bed now.  So I can wake up at the crack and make some headway.  Adieu!

IMG_9633